Saturday, October 23, 2010

It goes without saying that Dungeons & Dragons is a deal breaker right?

Received this message yesterday: I read your profile and you seem really interesting. I would like to get to know you better. 
 Now I hate these kind of messages, because they are just really hard to respond to, at least ask me a question or something. (Not that there was a possibility of me responding in this case anyway. Keep reading.)

Meet this guy, he's a 24 year old D&D enthusiast from Farmington Michigan. His photo is one of the creepiest I've yet seen -- the best description I can come up with is of a young Darth Sideous, with the hood and all.
One of the first things that jumped out to me on his profile was this:
I currently have 2 albino corn snakes as pets. Their names are Opal and Pearl. They are young and only about 2 feet long and about as wide as a dime. Once fully grown they will be 3-4 feet long and a little wider then a beer bottle cap.

I've never had a reason to even consider this before but I feel pretty confident in adding "owns snakes" to my (ever-growing thanks to OKC) list of deal breakers. I'm not even that squeamish about reptiles generally, I just find snakes to be really disturbing animals, and cannot understand why anyone would ever want them as a pet. I'm now imagining going to some guys house and seeing these huge snakes in some large glass tank, and I think I would have to leave. Shudder. Shudder. Shudder.


He also (as already mentioned) makes frequent mention of Dungeons & Dragons.
  • Under 6 things I could never do without guess where D&D ranks? Number 1 of course.
  • He also spends a lot of time thinking about: D&D campaigns and movie Ideas.
  • On a typical Friday night he is: Usually at home working on D&D stuff 
  • You should message him If your interested in playing D&D (even if your not interested in dating)
 It is profiles like this that make me want to go into the OKC Profile consulting business.  If I couldn't convince him to remove all references to D&D he really, really needs to limit it to just ONE mention.

6 comments:

  1. if i got pet rats would it be a friendship deal-breaker?

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  2. no, no, no rats are ok. my sister had a cute rat when we were growing up.

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  3. To be fair, when he finally does get a date, they'll probably get along really well. Even if he does have to inflate her.

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  4. Aw, is D&D really such a deal breaker?

    I remember in my younger days, I gave it a go. I... couldn't really get into it, but there are some perfectly nice people who play it. And some creeps, but hey, what doesn't have that.

    Though mentioning anything over and over again gets a bit tedious. :/

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